Having A Bad Attitude Is Like Wearing Sweaty Socks– They Both Stink And Only You Can Change Them…

My twin sister, Cindy Daniel is never at a loss for words. There may be a lot of inspirational quotes on Twitter but, none are as popular as the original and creative #Cindyism Quotes. Why? Because Cindy said it first. 

Although we are twins, I’ve never been hilarious. I’m OCD and constantly stressed out about everything in my life. 

For over a year now, my dad and niece have only added to my hypertension. Cindy uses humor to deal with the drama. Laughter IS HER medicine. For the past month, we have been busier than a highway flagger with the hives or rope at a rodeo. Stacking up Events prior to heading to California for Destination Events and booking up our schedules in Texas has left Cindy and I with little or no time to catch our breath.

Yesterday as I headed to Tennessee Colony to meet my TDCJ Michael Unit bride for photos before heading to the Unit, Cindy was headed to meet my father at a Fort Worth hospital for a stent. I was concerned about this because dad can be a handful. 

Late Monday afternoon, Cindy finally got a call from her daughter, Stephaney who has been missing since last Saturday. As expected, Stephaney was involuntarily committed at John Petersmith hospital. 

This call came in to Cindy AFTER I had met my niece, Leigh Ann at El Fenix for lunch to ask what exactly had happened while we were in Los Angeles. The manager, a friend from Stephaney’s job at El Fenix in Weatherford was still upset about what he had seen. 

Mariah, a friend of my sons saw it all. She joined Leigh Ann and I at our table to discuss what Stephaney was doing at the time of Stephaney’s subsequent detention. “Shadow boxing trees, yelling it’s the end of the world, dancing in front of cars and screaming at passers by including guests of El Fenix. It’s the worst that I have ever seen your niece behave and I’ve seen a lot. She needs help and I hope she gets it. I’m so sorry for your family.” 

What Mariah didn’t know was that while dealing with Stephaney, we’ve also been dealing with my dad. 

Leigh Ann and I were shocked at this description of my niece outside El Fenix. Stephaney has been off her meds over a month. Why? Because she was squatting at an estate next door to me since April and after dancing in the streets near my home, drew attention to herself to such an extent that neighbors finally located the owner. 

The medications? Lithium and Seroquil to name the two most important stabilizing medications. 

Having my niece squatting next door and behaving erratically for six months was Hell. In April and May, Stephaney had a good paying job in fact, the best job she has ever had but, by mid May, Stephaney was accusing other servers of being FBI Agents spying on her and management of trying to poison her. By June, Stephaney was unemployed and OUT OF CONTROL. 

Looking for my niece when Cindy and I weren’t working became a regular occurrence. So regular that homeless people knew who we were and who we were looking for. Cindy and I bought food and cigarettes for Stephaney in between involuntary commitments to numerous Psych Wards. From April to now, Stephaney has involuntarily committed NINE TIMES.

Whenever we can’t locate my niece, we automatically assume she’s been hauled off to the nut house again. The problem is that Stephaney can’t call for three days and wondering if she’s dead or alive is stressful.

My FB Memories popped up again last night and exactly four years ago, Cindy and I were headed to Oklahoma to move Stephaney from Cotton County Jail to Court Ordered Rehab that I had paid for. It’s tragic but true that as usual, Cindy and I had hoped this stint in jail and treatment would “snap Stephaney out of it.” 

For three years after treatment, Stephaney was stable. This “break” gave us false hope that Stephaney would finally get her life together but, we were wrong again. 

Now that Stephaney is “stuck” at the crazy house with a court date on November 5th, Cindy and I will be spending today at the courthouse trying to find information on contacting her court appointed attorney. Why? Because when you are in a nut house you can’t leave for a court hearing. 

Today is chock full of addressing (as usual) our dad’s needs, running to my chiropractor and picking up items for tomorrow’s wedding at TDCJ Beto Unit and the courthouse for Stephaney as well as running to the cleaners, fixing my broken glasses and going by Willow Lake Event Center.

Outside of Corsicana yesterday, Cindy sent me a text regarding a nurse concerned that dad was senile. For a year now, dad has been acting more than a little “odd.” But, he has kept his theories to mostly family members and apparently only yesterday began discussing the poison gas that intruders he believes are living in his attic have been pumping into his home and his car. 

Not surprisingly, Cindy was concerned that now a medical professional was aware of this issue outside of Wellbridge where our dad was committed last July for shooting at the attic. 

The nurse instructed Cindy to tell dad’s primary care physician that he needs to be screened for dementia. Meanwhile, our sister in law, Michelle called Cindy to give her advice on what to do about dad. This unwelcome advice continues to irritate and annoy us. 

Why? Because the people giving us their helpful advice are sitting on their butts in the comfort of their homes while we are literally in the trenches dealing with crazy head on. 

Trying act normal in an abnormal world has become a daily routine for my twin and I. We try to wake up and face the day with a positive attitude but, the texts and phone calls are never far away from ruining our day. From other relatives “trying to be helpful” or from Stephaney at JPS or dad. It’s never ending.

Worrying about Cindy stuck at a hospital with dad, my copilot, Leigh Ann and backseat buddy, baby Maddy wondered what would happen next with dad? I was actually worried about Stephaney too but, worrying won’t straighten either of them out. Trust me. 

Cindy and I have worried ourselves silly and tried every solution to get our family back on track that there is. 

Cindy has come up with new material for her Quotes based on the life experiences of unexpected surprises her daughter and our dad have brought to our lives. 

 “LIFE is a ROAD trip, the PESSIMIST will SEE a FLAT tire, the OPTIMIST will GET the SPARE, the REALIST will CHANGE it, and CHECK the AIR” (I am a realist).

“I would PREFER to BE a DIME store LAMP that LIGHTS up the ROOM, than TO be a PRICELESS statue, IN a CORNER gathering DUST, anyday”! (MONEY ain’t EVERYTHING).

 “UNLESS you have MADE the JOURNEY, never ATTEMPT to OFFER others, DIRECTIONS for their TRIP” Amen.

“CLASS can’t be BOUGHT, it HAS to be TAUGHT, paying HIGHER tuition WON’T supersede free COMMON sense and MORALS, the lessons LEARNED from a good HOME, aren’t INCLUDED in a TRUST fund.”

 “PASSION is the PLOW that PUSHES your DREAMS, into REALITY.”

“Be the HUSTLE that REFUSES to SIT.” 

“Your COMFORT zone IS located on BARREN land, don’t EXPECT any PERSONAL growth, UNLESS you are WILLING to MOVE.”

By the time we finished bridal photos with Jordan to head to the Michael Unit, I was checking in with Cindy again and getting no answer which further frightened me. 

Maddy jumped in on many of the photos but, my clients know that I’m often with Cindy, my twin grandnieces, my niece or grandniece. It’s a family affair. Would they transport dad to the nut house too? My dad had planned to drive himself AFTER SURGERY to have his car checked again for trace elements of poison gas. I advised Cindy that dad shouldn’t be driving but hey, we can’t stop him. No one can. 

Leaving Michael Unit, I again tried to call Cindy as Jordan followed my SUV to Corsicana for lunch with Leigh Ann, Maddy and I. 

Finally, I called my dad instead. Cindy and dad were at Pappasitos having lunch. The hospital let dad go although his paranoid theories were alarming to the hospital staff they apparently weren’t alarming enough to warrant transporting dad back to a Psych Ward. 

While having lunch in Corsicana, Cindy and dad were at Walmart buying a toilet seat, flextape, rain ponchos, and other interesting items. Let’s go over why. The flextape? To fix a leak under the sink and secure the tent over dad’s bed. The rain ponchos? To protect dad from the invisible poison gas that he’s convinced is coming in through the vents. 

Arriving back in Fort Worth with Leigh Ann and Maddy, I stopped at my dads house three blocks from my home to check on Cindy. 

My dad wanted to know if I know any exorcists? The only person that I know who performs these rituals is Bill Bean. I won’t because I’m uncomfortable about taking on Demons. My dad now thinks the house is haunted and wants me to find someone to excorcise it. 

Cindy was busy taping up the clear plastic tent that we had put up a month ago to get my dad back into the house so he would stop sleeping in his car. Apparently, it keeps falling down. 

Stephaney has been living with dad since leaving the estate next door to my house on Byers and helping him. My dad will be lonely without her at his house. 

My dad has 100% blockage in his main artery of the upper thigh. Arriving home again, I googled to find out if this condition would cause senility or dementia. It does. Vascular Dementia. 

Vascular dementia (VAD) is the second most common form of dementia after Alzheimer’s disease and is caused by damage to brain tissue due to decreased blood flow. Strokes, mini-strokes (TIAs) and congestive heart failure can be the root causes of these conditions.

A few months ago, Cindy and I were convinced dad had suffered a stroke. We took him to the hospital and he hadn’t. At the hospital yesterday, his doctor decided not to treat the blockage because it wasn’t causing pain? 

You can develop vascular dementia after a stroke blocks an artery in your brain, but strokes don’t always cause vascular dementia. … Vascular dementia can also result from other conditions that damage blood vessels and reduce circulation, depriving your brain of vital oxygen and nutrients.

Forcing my dad to get this blockage treated WILL NOT BE EASY. My dad doesn’t think this blockage is a problem and is concerned about undergoing another surgery but, it may be the only way we get my dad back to his old self. 

Throughout our lives, our dad has never had wild theories in his life. He is short tempered though and upset that we don’t believe him. It’s difficult to just “go along with someone” who believes things that aren’t true. 

For months our brother didn’t believe what we were telling him about dad. Our brother finally did in July when I called him while dad was transported to JPS first and Wellbridge after three days. 

JPS Tenth Floor is the clearing house of psychiatric treatment in Fort Worth. Nearly everyone checks in there only to be moved somewhere else. The Tenth Floor keeps patients three days before deciding where to move them. 

Many people have emailed me seeking information regarding missing loved ones that have been following my blogs. In order to obtain information, you must have the patient code. 

Without it, NO PSYCH WARD will release patient information. I would love to help you find your loved one but, the only patients I see when visiting my dad of my niece are patients with visitors. Other patients aren’t allowed in the visitation room during visitation. I’m very sorry. 

Yesterday while helping Cindy, I noticed that something had been sprayed on that tent and pointed it out to Cindy. 

My dad is spraying his own concoction of chemicals to “drive the intruders away.” I am guessing that the streaks of fluid on the tent are from my dad spraying them but, who knows? The craziness of “going along with dad” to keep from upsetting him is never ending.

My dad would like to burn the house down but, where would he live? My dad now hates the house that he and Gretta shared for six years before her sudden passing. I miss Gretta everyday. She was hilarious and fun with a zest for life. The twins loved having sleepovers with “Big Mama and Grandpa.” One month into her aggressive treatment for breast cancer, she died. 

My dad had called while I was shopping to tell me to come to the house immediately because the police were there. I will never forget walking into Gretta’s room and finding her like that. Getting her out was a problem for the coroner because Gretta was a hoarder. Gretta shopped online and the entire house was filled with boxes and purchases she had made since the death of her beloved husband, Olin. 

Because dad and Gretta never married, Gretta’s sister was able to “stall” burial plans by being the next of kin. I advise anyone in a relationship choosing not to marry to obtain a Burial Affidavit for good reason, without it, you cannot make burial decisions for your loved one. 

My dad has been in probate for nearly seven years now and whether it’s a blocked artery or dementia Cindy and I have no idea. We want to get this issue fixed but, it isn’t easy with dad. 

What we are certain of is that advice from our aunt or our brother or our brothers wife is unwelcome. We are sick and tired of everyone thinking all of this is funny when it isn’t. 

We are worried about dad and Stephaney while trying to act normal for our families and our clients.

I stopped to check on dad on my way to my chiropractic doctor after knocking my hip out helping a lady who had hit a large rock that fell from a truck. Cindy joined me at the attorneys office for Stephaney and at Parker County Urgent Care for a Toradol shot. 

Our urgent care doctor there always keeps up with our family. Two days ago, he treated Maryssa and Makenna for bronchitis and wasn’t surprised to see Cindy and I as he assumed we were sick too.

Getting a call from Stephaney, we left Parker County to go buy more “Psych Friendly Clothing.” Believe it or not, JPS has pretty stringent guidelines. Only travel sized personal hygiene products and certain colors are allowed. No lace on panties. No underwires on bras. 

Buying Psych Ward clothing has occupied more time and expense for Cindy and than anyone  realizes. A full year of buying more Psych Ward friendly clothing every single time Stephaney has been committed? Yes. Shoes and toiletries too. 

Heading home in the pouring rain with Cindy’s home flooded and my brand new roof, I wearily know that more rain is causing more problems for everyone in Fort Worth. 

I’m thankful my new roof won’t cave in but, Cindy’s basement has been a problem for years and more rain will bring more flooding.

Tomorrow morning, Cindy and I leave Fort Worth in the rain again to drive to TDCJ Beto Unit and meet my brides. It’s another busy day for the Texas Twins.

I had a request for a photographer at Willow Lake Event Center this Sunday but, my photographers charge $75 an hour so they STAY BOOKED OUT. Thankfully, my friend, Myrick Holder has volunteered to save the day. God Bless him.

Nearly every week, someone contacts me to generate more business. I’m already spread thin as is my family aka my Texas Twins Events Team. We have more business than we can handle. Thanks but, no thanks. The last thing we need are more clients than we can handle. Paying to advertise isn’t something of interest to me. 

Tomorrow on our way back from Beto Unit, I’m stopping to view a Pawning Planners trade and hoping the item is in good condition. Mansfield is on our way to Fort Worth. 

Bartering is tricky. Many folks have asked how we make it work. Texas Twins Treasures is our storefront for bartered items we take in trade. You need an outlet to sell items and you need product knowledge to make bartering work. You also need to know the market. 

Bartering and selling aka “flipping” often require refurbishing which can get expensive. Be aware of this. Cindy and I have sold items for years and years and also represented numerous brands so we are experienced appraisers. If you aren’t, you probably shouldn’t consider bartering. Blunders are expensive. 

For those seeking to trade for their Event Service, please visit my sister site, The Pawning Planners- Barter Your Event Service With The Pawning Planners- Wendy Wortham and Cindy Daniel.

Like many other North Texans, we are hoping the rain stops soon and hoping for safe travels on yet another day of adventures and also praying Stephaney is stable for our visit tomorrow after leaving Mansfield. But, we never know. Every visit to a Psych Ward is different. The other patients are as unpredictable as our own family members. 

Cindy and I always take a moment to catch our breath before “going in.” We attempt to mask our despair at being back at yet another Psych Ward. We try to pretend that’s it’s a regular day but, it isn’t. Visiting a relative that continues to get committed. 

Stephaney has a court date November 5th and whether she will be released or not we have no idea but, we remain hopeful that finding the right treatment will get Stephaney back on track and getting dad’s surgery brings our old dad back. Only time will tell…